Impossibly Knotted Up Necklace – A Practice in Sticking With It

While in a session with a client, she brought up an insight she had the week before:  She’s been working on creating a way to produce income involving something she really loves, but she’s hitting a bit of a wall.

She was contemplating on her life experiences—those times she took on a project or wanted to make a change in her life—and noticed that she rarely saw things through to the end.  She recalled how she would get frustrated with the process, with how long things were taking, and would abandon the project.

She compared it to having a particular necklace she wanted to wear, but upon bringing it out, discovering it was full of knots.  Those tiny, tight, bunched-up knots.  If you have ever tried to unknot a chain link necklace, you know this is no easy task.  Humans are not designed with fingers tiny enough to work out these kinds of knots.

She would pick and pick and pick with no movement in the links to indicate they were loosening even a little.  The frustration of not getting anywhere would rise up in her, an ever-growing flame of irritation, and it would end with her flinging the necklace off to the corner, giving up on believing she would ever be able to get the knots out.

This is such a great illustration.  When we start something new in our lives, we can give up so quickly when we hit an obstacle, it becomes too difficult, or unforeseen challenges appear.

 

Any new activity can be completed with ease and enjoyment, it is the practice of being in tune with the thoughts that incessantly say, “This is not going well, it is not fun, it can’t be done.”

Before you begin the task, prepare yourself by relaxing your mind and body.  Take three deep breaths and imagine the tension in your body melting away.  Tackle the biggest knot, or the biggest obstacle, most difficult task, etc. first.  I affectionately call it “eating the frog”, or doing first what is least enjoyable.  Stay with the task, yet be on the alert when your body starts to tense up. Take a short break and breathe.  Feel the mind and body relax, then continue with the task.  Do you need a tool to assist?  Tweezers to hold the chain, a magnifying glass, a needle to get into the knot?  Equip yourself for success.  Perhaps you need to ask for help.

The practice is to be alert to when your thoughts want you to stop and abandon what you are doing.  Stick with it, through the discomfort.  Go through the finish line.  When you do (and you will), the satisfaction and delight will serve as an anchor to fuel you through the next task, and the next, and the next.  Each bringing more confidence in your abilities and conviction you can do anything you put your mind to!